Monday, August 3, 2009

FrankenAnkle Strikes Again

Just call me FrankenAnkle. Go ahead, it's got a good ring. It sounds better than FrankenFoot, although there is technically nothing wrong with that name, either. It's slightly less exciting than the WereVampire, which is a character in a book my son and I thought of together and is more or less written in our heads. You see, a werewolf was bitten by a vampire, and, well, that's pretty much the story. He rampages through town, the mob chases him out with burning torches and spiky-sharp pitchforks, and even the children put their DS's in their pockets to participate in the madness and mayhem.

But it's not Halloweeen, you say? You're right. It is only Halloween in my sock. Underneath the silver glitter and purple argyle lie the hideous scars that only a mad scientist could love. Even with my clever disguise, the pain reminds me of their presence. So it's no use to hide them or pretend they do not exist.

The good news is that someday they won't hurt at all anymore, and instead of looking as if I am a rag doll pieced together by somebody's well-meaning blind grandmother in the dark, I will appear as if moonbeams have kissed my skin and gentle fairies have blessed my foot with the power to walk again.

In the meantime, I guess I'm free to fiendishly roam the streets at night, wearing my Borg Boot of Doom, stealthfully clanking along with my crutches, searching for victims to die of fright when I slowly peel away my sock and expose ... nah, I wouldn't do that to YOU! No pictures today.

Coming soon, to a bookstore near you:

FrankenAnkle Takes a Shower

FrankenAnkle Drives a Car

FrankenAnkle Sleeps Through the Night

FrankenAnkle Goes Back to Work

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  1. Borg Boot of Doom. I'm loving it! My stepdad broke his ankle at work a couple of months ago and he had to wear this really awkward "boot" for a while. Now he just has a little cast. I don't think anything of it but he's very self-conscious of it.

  2. Borg boot of doom was also my favorite. Too bad the TNG episode I just watched didn't have the Borg in it. (It was a Q episode, which are usually just as good as the borg or time travel episodes.)

  3. The FrankenAnkle series sounds very interesting. If you write them, I'll read them! :) Keep hanging in there!

  4. Good luck on your recovery. At least you're keeping a sense of humor about it. :) I'd probably just be whiney and annoying to all those around me.

  5. FG: Oh, I do that, too! ~raises hand~ Me, me! I whine! I do!

  6. LOL Thx for all of your support! The BBD thanks you, too!

  7. I loved Mary Shelley's Frankenstein... and your sounds just as good! ;) And your title is sooo catchy.

  8. Ok, I came up with two ideas for the FrankenAnkle. First of all, you could get Al Franken to star as the FrankenAnkle. That would be interesting. Second, I'm wondering if FrankenAnkle is a child-friendly way of saying something else. Kinda like "This Franken ankle is driving me crazy!"

  9. Al Franken! LOL And no, I didn't mean for it to be a cuss word substitute, but this morning, well, it just might apply! Thx!


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